Saoirse

Moderator
What do they REALLY think?
I know I could be accused of generalising in this question so please dont take it that way

What I would like to know either from Turkish members or from members with Turkish partners or relatives is, what do they REALLY think of us yabancis?

Do we get a fools pardon re local customs and practices? Are we seen as arrogant/ignorant?

Just love to know some insight and I stress again I know this is generalising to a certain extent
 

pineapple1

I Love Kleopatra Beach !
What do they REALLY think?
As you know my Husband is Turkish and the answer isn't easy . Some people are seen as ignorent especialy when they've had 1 over the 8 , But for the most part those of us of a certain age are held in respect ,especialy when they get friendly with you ,
But they do wonder why the English have to drink so much , I've lost count of the times i've heard " your English and you don't drink !" Has for the ladies well it depends if your realy respect yourself or not , and if not then how can you expect respect back , What they really don't like is people who give them a hard time to save 1or2 lira and people who are just plain rude , Yes i know people don't like touts but they have to live too , Then the next ones are the people who have never been befor ..Thats a different storey they are known as " new fish " meaning they don't know the ropes and they can be caught and overcharged !!! SO this question isn't has easy as some might think , plus it depends on the person and the Turk thier speaking to and how they speak , ...A long time ago in Side i remember a jewller kept on asking me to look in his shop , I'm sorry to say i lost my cool , And he said in a quiet voice " Madam you are flesh and blood and i am flesh and blood so am i any less human than you " I never forgot that so if you want respect treat people the way you would want to be treated ......Diane...... ps yes Ceemac they still think we're well off how many of them have holidays abroad and holiday homes ? no offence intended
 
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carolk

R.I.P
What do they REALLY think?
I know I could be accused of generalising in this question so please dont take it that way

What I would like to know either from Turkish members or from members with Turkish partners or relatives is, what do they REALLY think of us yabancis?

Do we get a fools pardon re local customs and practices? Are we seen as arrogant/ignorant?

Just love to know some insight and I stress again I know this is generalising to a certain extent

Still looking for a ruckus Phillip? This must be your 5th or 6th attempt! :gulme:
 

pineapple1

I Love Kleopatra Beach !
What do they REALLY think?
Morning Carol , Rukus ?? 5th or 6th attemp ?? Better keep my head down enough to do trying to cope with snow ........Diane
 

peter the postie

Wer'e not really here
What do they REALLY think?
Its a good question, and one that I've often pondered too. Time for our Shirl to step in I think.
 
What do they REALLY think?
It may well be different in areas that cater to foreign tourists but in my experience the majority of Turks don't give a stuff about foreigners, and have no interest in them - why should they? Foreigners are a tiny minority in a huge country where most nationals rarely, if ever, have any real contact with them.

The same prejeudices exist here as in most countries - many Turks dislike foreigners (certainly true of many English, Germans and French), have a distrust of other cultures (see last bracket!), and form their opinions from news reports and imported TV programmes. The West is often viewed as wasteful, decadent, morally corrupt and God-less, and not just by people who have never been out of Turkey. The war in Iraq has been hugely damaging to the image Turks have of Western nations.

Those Turks that do have regulary contact with foreigners are usually working in tourism, meeting people who can afford foreign holidays, stay in 5*hotels, drink expensive alcohol, buy and furnish houses - of course they believe that all foreigners are rich because compared to the living standards of most ordinary Turks we are!

For those of us who live in Turkish communities the only way to acceptance and integration is through language - learn Turkish rather than expect your neighbours to speak English. Explaining to my very traditional and conservative landlord and his family that most English people I know were equally appalled by the invasion/occupation of Iraq was a revelation to them. As was the idea that I worked for 44 years in order to be able to retire with a pension, rather than being wealthy which they'd previously believed.


Just my opinion, for what it's worth.
 

alison09400

Moderator
What do they REALLY think?
Great replies from both Diane and Yildez.

As Diane says every turkish person will have a different reply.....it's not something that can be generalised. I can remember the first time I met my mother-in-law 20 years ago. We went to the family home on the outskirts of Soke a few months before we got married. I was the first foreigner she'd ever met or come in to close contact with....she just stood there and looked at me. The younger kids were astounded. Granny wouldn't even come to visit if I was there as I was seen as the "Gavur" (unbeliever).... she only agreed to meet me after we got married.
Over the years I've seen a big change in the attitude towards foreigners by the ordinary people.....not those who live and work in Kusadasi..but those who live in that wee village outside Soke. Many of those who talked about my husband for marrying a foreigner and looking at me with distain...now have foreign daughters-in-law of their own. They can now see that we don't have 2 heads and even though we're not Muslim we're nice people (*tongue in cheek*).
There are of course Turks who don't like the fact that foreigners are buying up land/properties etc .....I think it's the MHP political party who are against this (someone correct me if I'm wrong).
 

Bill & Linda

Senior Members
What do they REALLY think?
It may well be different in areas that cater to foreign tourists but in my experience the majority of Turks don't give a stuff about foreigners, and have no interest in them - why should they? Foreigners are a tiny minority in a huge country where most nationals rarely, if ever, have any real contact with them.

The same prejeudices exist here as in most countries - many Turks dislike foreigners (certainly true of many English, Germans and French), have a distrust of other cultures (see last bracket!), and form their opinions from news reports and imported TV programmes. The West is often viewed as wasteful, decadent, morally corrupt and God-less, and not just by people who have never been out of Turkey. The war in Iraq has been hugely damaging to the image Turks have of Western nations.

Those Turks that do have regulary contact with foreigners are usually working in tourism, meeting people who can afford foreign holidays, stay in 5*hotels, drink expensive alcohol, buy and furnish houses - of course they believe that all foreigners are rich because compared to the living standards of most ordinary Turks we are!

For those of us who live in Turkish communities the only way to acceptance and integration is through language - learn Turkish rather than expect your neighbours to speak English. Explaining to my very traditional and conservative landlord and his family that most English people I know were equally appalled by the invasion/occupation of Iraq was a revelation to them. As was the idea that I worked for 44 years in order to be able to retire with a pension, rather than being wealthy which they'd previously believed.


Just my opinion, for what it's worth.

I think if you spoke to most English people and told them there are estate after estate of empty houses, thousands upon thousands of homes that are just used for a few months of the year (as most sitesi houses are)!! they would think there are a few Turkish people with a few bob as well.:hmm:
 
What do they REALLY think?
I think if you spoke to most English people and told them there are estate after estate of empty houses, thousands upon thousands of homes that are just used for a few months of the year (as most sitesi houses are)!! they would think there are a few Turkish people with a few bob as well.:hmm:
You are spot on..there is a huge amount of people in the big 3 cities of Istanbul, Ankara and Izmir that have a 'yazlik' (summerhouse)....I spent many years living in Istanbul and was astounded at the amount of people I came into contact with who had second homes, often thinking, at the time, that the majority of English people could never afford a second home like this. Its very normal in the proffessional middle classes of this country to own a holiday home, and of course those people do not see most foreign toursits or esidents as being rich. However it is very different on the southern coasts of the med and the aegean, as the population dynamics are different, with a much lower percentage of proffessional middle class Turks.
 

pineapple1

I Love Kleopatra Beach !
What do they REALLY think?
I am not going to copy Yildaz Post again .... to save space !!
But I can't agree on some points ..They do care about people , When my mum was seriusly ill in hospital in Marmaris and was rushed by abulance to intensive care . A man at a nearby shop told me to take his car whenever i wanted it to instead of paying for Taxi's i used his car day and night for 6 days , Also whenever anyone saw me struggling up the kerbs with mums wheelchair 2 or 3 men would allways appear from nowere and just lift it up onto the pavement , And i've never had to lift my own suitcase !!! One transfer driver stopped so both of us could have a ciggarette , 2 hrs from Antalya to Alanya ,
And one taxi driver took me to see Shirley at the Eden bar and wouldn't take any money and the same when i had to go to Hospital !!! No Turkish have ever been rude to me , But i've seen plenty of brits being rude to them !!!! I always smile and be polite and i find they are warm friendly people ...Thats why i married one !!!........Diane
 
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pineapple1

I Love Kleopatra Beach !
What do they REALLY think?
Diane I think you are right- when individuals are around foreigners, 99.9% of the time they are very helpful and generous. But Yıldez is talking about the general population who have never met foreigners, that point you have missed IMO :)

Traveling with my hubby in the car we have been to many out of the way villages were tourists don't normaly go and one old lady was so curious she kept turning me around to look at me !!! She told hubby it was the first time she had seen a european woman and brought me a cold drink ,
and in a little back street cafe in Izmir i couldn't tell them what i wanted so i texed it to hubby who texed it back in Turkish bless they all clapped and made me very welcome ,
 

Guz1

Member
What do they REALLY think?
The meaning I took from Yildez's post was that the vast majority of Turks outside the tourist areas are just getting on with their lives and aren't bothered one way or the other about foreigners they haven't met and are unlikely to meet. I don't think she was suggesting that they would be less than hospitable or kindly should they encounter foreigners.
 
What do they REALLY think?
How do they see us.....in many different ways, and depending on the background and area they come will this affect their opinion.

Many Turks refer to us as 'avrupa insanlar' European people..We are the ones who have pointed out the differences and the hostilities that exist between say the Welsh and the English or Scots or Germans etc..apart from that we are seen as European.

Like Alison Yildez Suzyq and others that live within a Turkish family we have a unique insight into opinions..but even then foreigners are viewed from different perspectives depending on the type of community since there is a world of difference between Hatay and Samson Datça and Soke.

Turks in general think well of people, wherever they are from. Their ethos is to help (yardim sever)and to be hospitable,...misafirpervelik/hospitality is almost a religion to Turkish people and its genuine. They rarely speak ill of foriegners..unless the foreigner is too loud or offensive – yet again generally speaking they adapt an attitude towards transient visitors of 'live and let live' in other words most Turks are very tolerant of our ways. İ think it is ourselves who look upon our fellow countrymen with a critical eye and feel embarrased and ashamed as to what they must think of us.
When it comes to people on holiday some will say we are 'saf' which can mean anything from simple simon to pure and innocent in other words we are naive and not careful, and this is fair comment. Like tourist hotspots the world over people are ripe for the picking.To wily waiters or people who live on their wits we are easy to fool...hence 'saf'...but in carefree holiday mode we dont seem to mind..and anyway we appear to throw money and caution to the wind..when on holiday, and how wonderful it must be for a young saf Turk when he encounters this for the first time (once he gets over the shock) coming from the constraints of a tight moralistic background.
When young Turks come into contact with us for the first time they are in general guileless they believe you when you say you will go back or you will call again or promise to write or keep in touch...why say it if you dont mean it...and when you dont they are really upset and disappointed and trust is broken, which is why a certain cynicism has crept in.

İve lived for a time in Antakya but before that i was a frequent visitor and knew most of Yusufs family and neighbours but living there was different altogether..

Turkish women have so little experience outside of homemaking that they are proud of the talents they have with making things for the home, knitting ,crotchet ,cooking cleaning entertaining guests and serving them ..so the women were curious about the yabancı among them.and the role i would play and of course they now had the chance to see what 'we' were made of .
İ remember one evening when the usual procession of ladies were visiting there was a very young girl who had just got engaged and she was sitting on the settee next to me..she brazenly looked me up and down then jerked her thumb in my direction and said to Melahat(Yusufs stepmother )'yemek yapmak biliyor' does she know how to make food...(hah she didnt know i could speak Turkish) so i edged myself over and turned to look at her full in the face and said 'kim..ben mi' who do mean do you mean me...her mouth dropped open and all the other women glued their eyes to the dante and frantically crotched...but i laughed and said 'hey dont all women know how do make food ..its our job '..everybody heaved a sigh of relief that i wasnt offended.

İn Antakya i was often asked did 'we' know how to crotchet,make food ,clean, knit sew ..i could have been irritated but i realised how little they knew about foreigners and how sophisticated we must seem. They couldnt understand how i could spend hours on the computor and were not really impressed by my expertise. Biscuit and pickle making were far more important.All of them however wished they had their own money and some independence.

İ just put the question to Yusuf he was getting ready to go fishing...he said why are you asking..you know what we think....but i persisted .. and he said .....we never say anything bad, we dont think anything bad ..but as you know when there are crowds of tourists the first thought is money !
However he ended by saying 'we love them'...and that was without a drop of rakı.!
 

Robert

Member
What do they REALLY think?
I have lived in Akbuk for over three years now and have found the overwhelming number of Turkish people I have met to be very friendly, charming people. I would be devestated if I thought I was not welcome here. So come on you Turkish, get on line and tell me we ARE welcome.
L U T F E N!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
A K BU K SENI SEVIYOURUM (I think):blowkiss:
 

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