ceemac
Shake It Baby...
Read The Instructions....
On a blanket from Taiwan: "Not to be used as protection from a tornado".
On a helmet-mounted mirror used by American cyclists: "Remember, objects in the mirror are actually behind you".
On a Taiwanese shampoo: "Use repeatedly for severe damage".
On the bottle-top of a flavoured milk drink: "After opening, keep upright".
On a New Zealand insect spray: "This product is not tested on animals".
On a packet of Sunmaid raisins: "Why not try tossing over your favourite breakfast cereal?"
On Morphy Richards hairdryer: "Do not use while sleeping."
On a curling iron: "Do Not Insert Curling Iron Into Any Bodily Orifice"
On the bottom of a Coca-Cola bottle: "Do not open here."
On a can of spray paint: "Do not spray in your face."
On a bottle of bathtub cleaner: "For best results, start with clean bathtub before use."
On a container of lighter fluid: "WARNING: Contents flammable"
On a bottle of hand lotion: "Warning: Starts healing skin on contact."
On a box of household nails: "CAUTION! - Do NOT swallow nails. May cause irritation"
On a bag of Doritos: "You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside."
On a bar of Camay soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap."
On Findus frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost."
On a hotel provided shower cap in a box: "Fits one head."
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom of the box): "Do not turn upside down."
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating."
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body."
On Boot's Children's cough medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery."
On Nytol sleep aid: "Warning: may cause drowsiness."
On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only."
On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use."
On Sainsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts."
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: open packet, eat nuts."
On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."
On a child's Superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.
C
On a helmet-mounted mirror used by American cyclists: "Remember, objects in the mirror are actually behind you".
On a Taiwanese shampoo: "Use repeatedly for severe damage".
On the bottle-top of a flavoured milk drink: "After opening, keep upright".
On a New Zealand insect spray: "This product is not tested on animals".
On a packet of Sunmaid raisins: "Why not try tossing over your favourite breakfast cereal?"
On Morphy Richards hairdryer: "Do not use while sleeping."
On a curling iron: "Do Not Insert Curling Iron Into Any Bodily Orifice"
On the bottom of a Coca-Cola bottle: "Do not open here."
On a can of spray paint: "Do not spray in your face."
On a bottle of bathtub cleaner: "For best results, start with clean bathtub before use."
On a container of lighter fluid: "WARNING: Contents flammable"
On a bottle of hand lotion: "Warning: Starts healing skin on contact."
On a box of household nails: "CAUTION! - Do NOT swallow nails. May cause irritation"
On a bag of Doritos: "You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside."
On a bar of Camay soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap."
On Findus frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost."
On a hotel provided shower cap in a box: "Fits one head."
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom of the box): "Do not turn upside down."
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating."
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body."
On Boot's Children's cough medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery."
On Nytol sleep aid: "Warning: may cause drowsiness."
On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only."
On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use."
On Sainsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts."
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: open packet, eat nuts."
On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."
On a child's Superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.
C
