Jaycey

African Refugee
Political jokes
One day Vladimir Putin arrived at an elementary school, where he gave a lecture on all the reasons why Russia, under his leadership, is the best country in the world. After the lecture, he invited the children to ask him questions, and almost everyone raised their hand enthusiastically - after all, not every day they get to raise a question before the President of Russia. "Yes, cute girl," Putin said, pointing to a girl with braids, who began to speak, saying, "Hello, Mr. President. My name is Sasha and I wanted to know: Do you think one day Russia will return to itself as the Soviet Union, In the past? " "Of course," Putin replied. "It is only a matter of time before all the countries of Eastern Europe, and even the countries of the world, understand that it is in their favor." "Yes cute boy, next question please," Putin said, pointing to a boy with freckles, who said, "Hello Mr. President. My name is Arkady and I wanted to know: what is the secret of your success? Because you are the most powerful and important man in all of Russia." "The truth is," Putin said, "I am the most powerful and important man in the whole world, and the secret of my success is that I just know what is good for everyone, so everyone trusts me to run the country for the best." "Do you have any more questions?" Putin wondered, then pointed to a blond boy raising his hand. The boy spoke and said: "Hello Mr. President. My name is Boris and I wanted to know why Russia is sending troops to Ukraine and why we have annexed the Crimean peninsula from Ukraine to us?". A moment after Boris finished asking his question the break bell suddenly rang, and everyone went out for lunch. When the break was over, Putin and all the children returned to the lecture hall. "Yes sweet girl," Putin said, pointing to a girl with short hair who stood up. "Hello Mr. President. My name is Katya and I wanted to know where Boris is?"
 

Akasya

Postless Pointer
Political jokes
Singing and dancing all night long carries serious connotations in some countries , unfortunately .
Steve
 
Political jokes
My stupid Idiot of a Son.

Has just gone and Swapped our Cow for some Magic Beans.

So now I've got to offload them to some Gullible Ass-Hole, or we're all Ruined.

*


Does anyone have Boris Johnson's phone number..????
 

Camden

Member
Political jokes
A man dies and goes to heaven. As he is standing at the pearly gates he notices a huge wall of clocks behind St Peter.

"What are those clocks for ?" he asks.

"Those are lie clocks, every time someone tells a lie the hands on their clocks move"

"Oh" says the man "whose clock is that?" he says pointing.

"That's Mother Teresa's clock" says St Peter, "its hands have never moved"

"Wow" says the man "and who's clock is that?

"That's Abraham Lincolns clock, it's hands have only moved twice" says St Peter

"Where's Boris Johnson's clock?" asks the man

"Oh we use that one as a ceiling fan" replies St Peter.
 

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