Shake It Baby...
PC Nursery Rhymes
Whilst we were on the subject of political correctness on another thread, I noticed some pc changes have now been made to some nursery rhymes....

Jack & Jill
Two young persons of opposite gender, proceeded toward the apex of a natural geologic protuberance. The purpose of their expedition was to procure a sample of fluid hydride of oxygen in a large vessel, the exact size of which was omniously omitted from the record. As the male person precipitously descended, he consequently sustained severe damage to the upper cranial portion of his anatomy. A similar fate befell the female, who immediately after the male person, performed a self-rotational translation oriented in the same direction having been traversed by the young man.

Jack Spratt
Complications arose during a non-congressional investigation of dietary influence. One person of the male gender was unable to assimilate adipose tissue, and another person, of the female gender, was unable to consume tissue consisting chiefly of muscle fibre. A reciprocal arrangement between the two, who also happened to be a party of a domesticated alliance, allowed for the total consumption of the viands under consideration, which was unltimately achieved, thus, leaving the original container of the viands devoid of any contents.

Mary Had A Little Lamb
A young person of the female gender was the possessor of a small immature ruminant of the species genus Ovis, whose outermost covering reflected all wavelengths of visible light with a luminosity equal to that of a mass of naturally occurring microscopically crystalline water. Regardless of the translational path chosen by the aforesaid young person, there was a 100% probability that the aforementioned ruminant would select the same pathway.


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