ceemac

Shake It Baby...
Men Are Just Happier People
What do you expect from such simple creatures?

Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours.

Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack.

You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.

You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth.

The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another petrol station toilet because this one is just too yucky.

You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.

Wrinkles add character.

Wedding dress £2000. Tux rental-£100.

People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.

The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.

New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.

One mood all the time. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.

You know stuff about tanks. A five-day holiday requires only one suitcase.

You can open all your own jars.

You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.

If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.

Your underwear is £4.95 for a three-pack.

Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.

You almost never have strap problems in public.

You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.

Everything on your face stays its original colour.

The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.

You only have to shave your face and neck.

You can play with toys all your life.

One wallet and one pair of shoes one colour for all seasons.

You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.

You can 'do' your nails with a pocket knife.

You have freedom of choice concerning growing a moustache..

You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.


No wonder we men are happier!!


C
 

Harem

I've cliqued
Men Are Just Happier People
You might not have strap problems, but .........................................
 

Gin&Tonic

Member
Men Are Just Happier People
While we're on the subject of men, does anyone know why men insist on holding on for dear life to the TV remote control, you cant prise them off them with a crowbar !!!!!
 

red

.....
Men Are Just Happier People
G+T I think it's the same trait that won't let them ask for directions:)

ceemac - they are all oh so true - no wonder you lot lead a stress free life, the things us women have to put up with:) But - you missed out how lucky men are to have fairy's in their lives - the ones that pick dirty clothes up off the floor - oh and towels -oh and change the loo roll I could go on and on:)!!!
 

SuperBogs

I miss you Pebble
Men Are Just Happier People
G+T I think it's the same trait that won't let them ask for directions:)

ceemac - they are all oh so true - no wonder you lot lead a stress free life, the things us women have to put up with:) But - you missed out how lucky men are to have fairy's in their lives - the ones that pick dirty clothes up off the floor - oh and towels -oh and change the loo roll I could go on and on:)!!!

The loo roll doesn't change itself?

BB
 

red

.....
Men Are Just Happier People
The loo roll doesn't change itself?

BB


I hope you are sat down as this may come as quite a shock - are you ready - NO -it bloody doesn't and there are no sodding fairies - now please remain seated and rest a while:):roundgrin
 
Men Are Just Happier People
get a life craig..i could see that was written by an old codger in a tweed jacket and thats never seen out the top of the bottle. ..men!!

hmm..im back to edit..and put a few hahah's in in case i get accused of sexism
haha
 
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nanamo

Member
Men Are Just Happier People
Why do men have to put up a sign saying 'men working' women do it all the time without having to advertise the fact and if I ever needed a brain transplant I'd ask for a male one then I'd get one that had'nt been used. :77wu: Molly
 

ceemac

Shake It Baby...
Men Are Just Happier People
get a life craig..i could see that was written by an old codger in a tweed jacket and thats never seen out the top of the bottle. ..men!!

hmm..im back to edit..and put a few hahah's in in case i get accused of sexism
haha


You forgot my pipe, cardigan, and labrador at my feet Shirley.....

It's so gloriously uncomplicated for men though - why do women have such a drama over everything??

Here's some more examples of how we're ahem, much superior....

NICKNAMES
If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Kate and Sarah.

If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla and Four-eyes.

EATING OUT


When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in £20, even though it's only for £32.50.
None of them will have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.

When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.

MONEY


A man will pay £2 for a £1 item he needs.
A woman will pay £1 for a £2 item that she doesn't need but it's on sale
.

BATHROOMS


A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel from M&S.

The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337.
A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.

ARGUMENTS


A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

CATS


Women love cats.
Men say they love cats, but when women aren't looking, men kick cats.

FUTURE


A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband..
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

SUCCESS


A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

MARRIAGE


A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.

DRESSING UP


A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the bins, answer the phone, read a book, and get the post.
A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.

NATURAL


Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.
Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

OFFSPRING


Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children.
She knows about dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favourite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.

A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.



That's why we're blissfully happy....:77wu:

C
 

bobthenob

Non Active Member
Men Are Just Happier People
lt is naturally imbred in us to make the woman happy in her work that we men create.When man see's a woman happy that uplifts us to create alot more work for the woman.

Have you ever thought why men leave their clothes on the floor.lt has nothing to do with disrepecting one's other half,but more of a respect towards aiding her in excerising away all that flab she wants to lose to get in that barbie doll costume.So the more clothes we leave on the floor the more weight you will lose in double quick time for that tight outfit you so long to show off.

Their's no doubt about it that us men are a lot happier seeing the woman loosing all that weight for that ultimate goal of their's, to fit in something that doesn't make their bum look big in.

Shaving razors seem to accumulate on the bathtub ledge,like they been programmed to breed.You mention this to the woman and say,"have you been using my blades again".A gut instinct tells you not to take it any further if you want to live another day,when she replies back "no l haven't".l'm quite happy with that,because it gives me that excuse not to shave for another day.
 

Sunny Seasider

Life is so precious
Men Are Just Happier People
Why do Men always take their socks off and leave them inside out!!! Aaaaaaaggggghhhhhh, I get sooooooo frustrated when sorting the wash basket to also have to, not only pair up all the socks, but turn them right way out as well!!!!!, lol us girls love to look after you men because you gives us so much pleasure...............................
 

Martyn

Member
Men Are Just Happier People
We are going to Altinkum this Sunday and for the last two weeks my wife has been backwards and forwards to the shops buying clothes for her and for me as well even though I said I have enough. The two suit cases we take will contain 95% of her stuff and 5% of mine :biggrin1: I will have a £9 haircut tomorrow, my wife has had a hair whatever colour, cut wash etc(don't want to know how much it is), she had her nails done yesterday and she had a spray tan today :biggrin1:

I have done my side of the packing, passports, money, tickets, gadgets and insurance. Job done, I'm ready :roundgrin:peace:
 

pldouglas

Member
Men Are Just Happier People
Men! Bless 'em. Love mine to bits. And the fact is, yes they probably are happier than us ladies - mainly, perhaps, because men have simpler minds.
Am very happy to admit I couldn't be without my dearly beloved, but will have too soon because he is spending 3 weeks at our villa in Yalikavak while I stay in the cooler temperatures here.
 

Sunny Seasider

Life is so precious
Men Are Just Happier People
Sound just like us, work as a team, but we women are the leaders, lol. Crikey Martyn, £9 for a mans haircut, have you not got The Barbers Shop chain where you are? they only charge £3, my hubby's barber is from Adana, lovely guy, and good cutter too. I go along with him to practice my Turkish, lol
 

Harem

I've cliqued
Men Are Just Happier People
We are going to Altinkum this Sunday and for the last two weeks my wife has been backwards and forwards to the shops buying clothes for her and for me as well even though I said I have enough. The two suit cases we take will contain 95% of her stuff and 5% of mine :biggrin1: I will have a £9 haircut tomorrow, my wife has had a hair whatever colour, cut wash etc(don't want to know how much it is), she had her nails done yesterday and she had a spray tan today :biggrin1:

I have done my side of the packing, passports, money, tickets, gadgets and insurance. Job done, I'm ready :roundgrin:peace:

Why don't you both have your hair do's (and manicures, etc.) over here? Much cheaper.
 

Martyn

Member
Men Are Just Happier People
Why don't you both have your hair do's (and manicures, etc.) over here? Much cheaper.

I normally do, in fact I will. Tomorrow is off :biggrin1:

I have no nails to speak of paying for my wifes luxuries :roundgrin
 
Men Are Just Happier People
Craig..me again a short person...
your list is getting longer and longer kid typical male windiness ..trying too hard to get our attention. Give up lad.
Might i add that men have to call each other names in the old pals act and shoulder slap and punch etc etc..why..to proof how masculine they are.
whereas as we can be our sweet selves in girly get togethers...we leave hang ups for the tall people
 

zakkum

Member
Men Are Just Happier People
Please believe I have no intention of offending any one or their beliefs: -

Do not worry girls - "When God made man She was only testing"

zakkum
 

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