June Jokes '21.
The Wife's just been checking to see if she has everything ready for her first Solo Parachute Jump tomorrow.

I said, "Babes, do you have an extra Pair of Panties with you"..???

"Why’s that, in case I shit myself"..?? She replied.

"NO", I said,

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"It’s in case your Main Chute Doesn't Open”.
 

Frankie T

Member
June Jokes '21.
I went for a job at the Royal Mail sorting office yesterday, after the interview I was given a tour of the depot.

I asked the guy taking the tour "What's that machine?"

"That's the Acme 3000 Auto Sorter System, it can sort 150,000 letters an hour and it's 99.5% accurate. It's controlled by 12 super computers each one is 5000 times more powerful than an average desktop PC. It has over 15,000 state of the art optical location identification sensors, it contains enough circuit boards to entirely cover the pitch at Wembley stadium and it has 200 miles of fiber optic cable. It cost over £100 million to develop." He boasted proudly.

"What happens to the letters after it's finished sorting them?" I asked.

"We give them to a bloke on a push bike."
 
June Jokes '21.
The Judge found me guilty of stealing 2 Sofas from DFS.

He's given me 3 years in Jail,

But the good news is..??

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I don't have to start my Sentence until January 2024..
 

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