Derek Payne
Member
Derek Payne
Member
Derek Payne
Member
Humour, Rude not Racist
I decided to Turn Off my Mother-in-Law’s, life support machine.
And it was the Second Hardest thing, I've ever had to do.
Because, the Hardest Thing I've done,
Was trying to distract all those Doctors and Nurses.
And it was the Second Hardest thing, I've ever had to do.
Because, the Hardest Thing I've done,
Was trying to distract all those Doctors and Nurses.
IbrahimAbi
Grey wisdom
IbrahimAbi
Grey wisdom
Derek Payne
Member
Humour, Rude not Racist
I'm sure my mate, is having an affair with my Wife.
Cos, he's been a proper miserable bastard lately.
Cos, he's been a proper miserable bastard lately.
Akasya
Postless Pointer
Humour, Rude not Racist
Steve
We only had recourse to Lifeboy Carbolic soap , burned your eyes and tasted foul if you got mouthy with mum ( bless her soul )
Steve
bulldogxbmc
Member
IbrahimAbi
Grey wisdom
IbrahimAbi
Grey wisdom
Derek Payne
Member
Humour, Rude not Racist
An elderly Catholic man has taken Mass for so many years that he must have eaten an entire Jesus Christ-worth of communion wafers, the Vatican have today confirmed.
Simon Williams, an assistant to the Pope, told press, “Although God sees everything, we in the Catholic church like to keep a close eye on our congregants; how often they come to confession, how often they come to mass, and how often they come in a sexual context.”
He went on, “We are therefore aware of an old man in Sicily who has had Mass so frequently that thanks to the miracle of transubstantiation – which is definitely true and not superstitious hogwash – means he has now consumed an entire Jesus.
“I guess this means he has ‘completed’ Catholicism? Who knows how this works, we just tend to make it up as we go along.”
According to reports, the man wished to remain anonymous, but did tell friends that he is just trying not to think of the wafers he consumed that must have formed the certain naughty parts of Christ’s body.
An elderly Catholic man has taken Mass for so many years that he must have eaten an entire Jesus Christ-worth of communion wafers, the Vatican have today confirmed.
Simon Williams, an assistant to the Pope, told press, “Although God sees everything, we in the Catholic church like to keep a close eye on our congregants; how often they come to confession, how often they come to mass, and how often they come in a sexual context.”
He went on, “We are therefore aware of an old man in Sicily who has had Mass so frequently that thanks to the miracle of transubstantiation – which is definitely true and not superstitious hogwash – means he has now consumed an entire Jesus.
“I guess this means he has ‘completed’ Catholicism? Who knows how this works, we just tend to make it up as we go along.”
According to reports, the man wished to remain anonymous, but did tell friends that he is just trying not to think of the wafers he consumed that must have formed the certain naughty parts of Christ’s body.
Derek Payne
Member
Humour, Rude not Racist
I've just been nominated to do a ''Charity 25 Push-Ups a day Challenge, for 25 days''.
Well, I've Blocked that Prick.
Well, I've Blocked that Prick.
