Humour, Rude not Racist

[Derek Payne]

My Afghan mate, came to this Country with only One Pound in his Pocket.



And now he owns a Shopping Trolley .

 

[bulldogxbmc]

 

[SLEEPY]

 

[Derek Payne]

 

[Derek Payne]

 

[Saoirse]

!

 

[enoch]

!

View attachment 24975

Glad to see it's a capital C

 

[Derek Payne]

 

[SLEEPY]

 

[Jaycey]

A boy confesses to his priest. 'Bless me father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose girl.' The priest asks, 'Is that you, little Joey Pagano?' 'Yes, father, it is.' 'And who was the girl you were with?' 'I can't tell you, father, I don't want to ruin her reputation.' 'Well, Joey, I'm sure to find out her name sooner or later so you may as well tell me now. Was it Tina Minetti?' 'I cannot say.' 'Was it Nancy Connor?' 'I'll never tell.' 'Was it Judy Cohen?' 'I'm sorry, but I cannot name her.' 'Was it Kate Takenyo?' 'My lips are sealed.' 'Was it Rose DeMarco, then?' 'Please, Father, I cannot tell you.' The priest sighs in frustration. 'You're very tight lipped, and I admire that. But you've sinned and have to atone. You cannot be an altar boy now for 4 months. Now you go and behave yourself.' Joey walks back to his pew, and his friend Franco slides over and whispers, 'What'd you get?' Joey produces a sly smile: 'A four month holiday and five good leads.'

 

[Derek Payne]

Orgasms are like Cooking.


I could do it myself, but I prefer somebody else to do it for me.

 

[yalimart]

https://twitter.com/i/web/status/1467070065178816516

 

[Derek Payne]

 

[Derek Payne]

Q: How does a Jew celebrate Christmas?


A: He installs a parking meter on the roof.

 

[IbrahimAbi]

At least George Michael's new song about prison life can be released now....

Where he was making bed-time drinks for the inmates, and giving them hand-jobs.

'W*nk me off before your Cocoa'. Is due to be released in January.

 

[bulldogxbmc]

 

[Jaycey]

“Found this woman tied across the railroad tracks.

Rescued her and took her back to my place.

And we made passionate love all night”.



“Wuz she prooty?



“I dunno…



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Never found er hed”


.............................................................

 

[IbrahimAbi]

When I was young I decided I wanted to be a doctor so I took the entrance exam to go to Medical School.

One of the questions asked us to rearrange the letters PNEIS into the name of an important human body part which is most useful when erect.

Those who answered spine are doctors today. The rest of us are sending jokes via email.

 

[mollag]

 

[yalimart]