Shake It Baby...
Clever Lawyers?
You could reasonably assume that lawyers are pretty clever and astute couldn't you?

Here's a few actual questions (and answers sometimes), asked by lawyers during trials and well, oh dear.....

"Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?"

"The youngest son, the twenty-year old, how old is he?"

"Were you present when your picture was taken?"

"Were you alone or by yourself?"

"Was it you or your younger brother who was killed in the war?"

"Did he kill you?"

"How far apart were the vehicles at the time of the collision?"

"You were there until the time you left, is that true?"

"How many times have you committed suicide?"

Q: "So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?"
A: "Yes."
Q: "And what were you doing at that time?"

Q: "She had three children, right?"
A: "Yes."
Q: "How many were boys?"
A: "None."
Q: "Were there any girls?"

Q: "You say the stairs went down to the basement?"
A: "Yes."
Q: "And these stairs, did they go up also?"

Q: "How was your first marriage terminated?"
A: "By death."
Q: "And by whose death was it terminated?"

Q: "Can you describe the individual?"
A: "He was about medium height and had a beard."
Q: "Was this a male or female?"

Q: "This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?"
A: "Yes."
Q: "And in what ways does it affect your memory?"
A: "I forget."
Q: "You forget. Can you give us an example of something that you've

Q: "All your responses must be oral, OK? What school did you go to?"
A: "Oral."

Q: "Do you recall the time that you examined the body?"
A: "The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m."
Q: "And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?"
A: "No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an

Q: "Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead
A: "All my autopsies are performed on dead people."

Q: "You were not shot in the fracas?"
A: "No, I was shot midway between the fracas and the naval."

Q: "Are you qualified to give a urine sample?"
A: "I have been since early childhood."

Q: "Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check
for a pulse?"
A: "No."
Q: "Did you check for blood pressure?"
A: "No."
Q: "Did you check for breathing?"
A: "No."
Q: "So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when
you began the autopsy?"
A: "No."
Q: "How can you be so sure, doctor?"
A: "Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar."
Q: "But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?"
A: "It is possible that he could have been alive and practicing
law somewhere." (An absolute classic :hehe:)

Q: "How old is your son, the one living with you."
A: "Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which."
Q: "How long has he lived with you?"
A: "Forty-five years."

Q: "What was the first thing your husband said to you when he
woke that morning?"
A: "He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
Q: "And why did that upset you?"
A: "My name is Susan."

Q: "Sir, what is your IQ?"
A: "Well, I can see pretty well, I think."

Alan Fidler

Ceteris paribus
Clever Lawyers?
Very funny C, and lawyers are clever..?
Seems to me that those answering the questions are far smarter than the average lawyer..:77wu::77wu:



ex Bond Girl
Clever Lawyers?
Neither Colin and I have not laughed like that for a long time. Excellent

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