Beer by seven year olds

[steve & sue]

BEER BY SEVEN YEAR OLDS
>
> A handful of 7 year old children were asked
> 'What do you think of beer ? '. Some interesting responses.
>
> 'I think beer must be good. My Dad says the
> more beer he drinks the prettier my Mum gets.'
> --Tim, 7 years old
>
> 'Beer makes my Dad sleepy and we get to
> watch what we want on television when he is asleep, so beer is nice. '
> --Mellanie, 7 years old
>
> 'My Mum and Dad both like beer. My Mum gets
> funny when she drinks it and takes her top off at parties, but Dad doesn't
> think this is very funny.'
> --Grady, 7 years old
>
> ''My Mum and Dad talk funny when they drink beer and the more they drink the more they give kisses to each other,which is a good thing.'
> --Toby, 7 years old
>
> 'My Dad gets funny on beer. He is funny. He
> also wets his pants sometimes, so he shouldn't have too much.
> --Sarah, 7 years old
>
> 'My Dad loves beer. The more he drinks,the
> better he dances. One time he danced right into the pool.'
> --Lilly, 7 years old
>
> 'I don't like beer very much. Every time
> Dad drinks it, he burns the sausages on the barbecue and they taste
> disgusting.'
> --Ethan, 7 years old
>
> 'I give Dad's beer to the dog and he goes to sleep.'

> --Shirley, 7 years old
>
> 'My Mum drinks beer and she says silly
> things and picks on my Dad. Whenever she drinks beer she yells at Dad
> and tells him to go bury his bone down the street again, but that doesn't
> make any sense.'
> --Jack, 7 years old

 

[Peregrine]

Two fishermen were adrift in their rented boat due to an engine failure. While rummaging through the boat's provisions, one of the men stumbled across an old lamp. Secretly hoping that a genie would appear, he rubbed the lamp vigorously. To the amazement of the castaways, a genie came forth. This particular genie, however, stated that he could only deliver one wish, not the standard three.

Without giving much thought to the matter the man blurted out, "Make the entire ocean into beer!" The genie clapped his hands with a deafening crash, and immediately the entire sea turned into the finest brew ever sampled by mortals.

Simultaneously, the genie vanished. Only the gentle lapping of beer on the hull broke the stillness as the men considered their circumstances.

One man looked disgustedly at the other whose wish had been granted. After a long, tension filled moment, he spoke: "Nice going idiot! Now we're going to have to piss in the boat!"